PDA On Social Media- Too Much or Not Enough?

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s previously threatened, oh I mean promised, I give you the other side of Social Media PDA. Not the stalkerish/people looking for love in all the wrong places kind. Not the harmless "I need an ego boost" kind either. This time it's about the happy couples.

Avatars, or profile pics are one of the places couples show their coup;ehood. Instead of just a pic of the profile owner it's a pic that includes their significant other. It is my unscientific opinion that more women d this than men and more young lovers than older ones. It's something that is really not an issue unless you are jealous of said person for having someone or having someone that you want! I don't want to be known as so and so's mother or so and so's wife. I want to be known for me and I really do love "so and so"

Then we have the declarations of love. They are the equivalent to a soliliquy said under your beloveds balcony. They are you in the middle of the street where your beloved lives, holding a boom box over your head while it plays a love song. They aren't love letters because a love letter is private and a lost art if you ask me. Oh right, you didn't ask! When someone uses a facebook status to write about how they feel about their wife/husband, girlfriend/boyfriend or lover what they are really doing is declaring to all within their realm that they have found "the one".

I think the most important thing is still to tell the person you love, that you love them. Even more important are actions because without them words are meaningless no matter how often you use them. Still I think if you really love someone then you should use social media to say so. Just remember less is more. If it's your go to thing you will cause legions of followers to have a little stomach content start to rise up causing them to gag!

When I see it done right it makes me happy for the people involved. I've always been a romantic at heart. A little PDA can go a long way. Choose your words wisely.

PDA on Social Media-Part One

It could also be titled Online Flirting. PDA or public displays of affection are part of the social media world. Affection is always a good thing right? Rhetorical question, no answer required.

Facebook opened up a can of worms as it seems it is *the* place for PDA blunders. The newsfeed contains not only what you put out as your status but also what you wrote on someone elses status, wall or photo. It's there for the world to see. Well your circle of "friends" anyway. The news is filled with human interest stories of facebook leading to divorce and breakups because someone was facebook stupid. Carrying on a facebook affair on someones wall is the definition of dumbass. Having an affair is equally so but at least the facebook stupidity contributed to my entertainment!

I'm less interested in those using facebook as a dating service and if you're single then it's all fair game. I'm always interested in my fellow travelers, yeah you guys who have been traveling as long as I have been. Seems some of us use Facebook to stroke or maybe stoke our egos. Egos are like that, they need to be cared for and fed. Facebook works like a feedbag.

You're in your room or office or a cafe. It's you and your computer screen. That combo seems to free people up from their inhibitions and lets them say things they might not face to face. Pair that with the fact that you are once again in touch with old classmates from the angst ridden teen years. Except now you have less angst and hopefully polished your people skills. Now it's time to play a little game I like to call Yeah I Still Got It. Doesn't matter if you never had it,everyone gets to play.

A funny line with a double entendre thrown out on occasion to someone you used to date or had a crush on is no biggie because the key word is occasion as in not all the time. We all need to feel like we did when we were kids once in a while. Just don't cross the line.

These are things you will find if you cross over to the other side of the line-
1.Suggestive pictures- doesn't matter how good you really do look after all these years and it's not just a girl thing. I've seen guys do it too.
2.Constantly commenting on *everything* someone's status says. I don't care how witty your comments are it just screams "Get a life!" and borders on stalking.
3 If s person is married you might not want to constantly bring up some fun time that was had so long ago. Not that you could threaten a good marriage but more out of respect for the spouse who might see it. Once (if you must) is more than enough.

There is also a flip side. If someone compliments you on how good you look it doesn't have to mean they want you! If they have fond memories of some good times, they are not necessarily looking for a repeat now! Most of it is just some good old fashioned fun. Get over yourself.

This is the side of social media PDA I like the least. I love me a little PDA from those that knew me as a skinny awkward kid. So bring it every once in a while...please. I do get sad for those who seem to need it so much. It means that what they're getting in real life is not what they need. At this point in life it's time to learn how to get what you need. You won't find it on anyones Facebook page. It's kinda like we're all coming of age... again!

TO BE CONTINUED

SHOW US YOUR FACE

Remember when Facebook was for college kids? Now, well, not so much. In fact women our age are the fastest growing group on Facebook. That's the last *Factoid* I will be offering because as far as Facebook goes screw the statistics and have some fun.

I joined Facebook a few years ago. It started out as a networking thing. That in itself was fun. I joined different groups and got my name out there. I must confess that I am guilty of participation in Super Poke and Buy a Friend A Drink. Those days are thankfully over and with pride I can say that I don't farm or need any soldiers. For the yet uninitiated I am referring to Farmville and Mafia Wars. Two examples that prove you can get people to do almost anything. Right now I am more of a Facebook curmudgeon. Don't send me smiles, hugs or blessings. I'm going to ignore them. There, I said it. Now I have closure and can move on to the topic at hand.

I can't pinpoint exactly when it started but like dominoes, one after another I started reconnecting with my Elementary and Junior High School friends. Its been a blast. I am friends again with my first real best friend thanks to Facebook.Honestly, I never realized that I missed them until I started finding them again. With each new find we would giggle and shriek in a virtual little girl kind of way.

One of the things I like best is being the me I became over the years around these guys.. Part of me is still the 11, 12, 13 and 14 year old they knew. Now she just doesn't care as much about fitting in! My status updates on Facebook are my pride and joy. If they aren't funny I go without. So many of the old gang have told me how funny I am, like in a "who knew" kinda way. It happens when you shed your adolescent protective shell. Its a good thing about aging.

In a a purely anthropological way I have discovered that the nerds definitely inherited the earth. I like to see all the things the nerdy kids have accomplished although it is mixed with a wee bit of jealousy. Many of my old friends became teachers. The less nerdy ones. Not sure why. One of my old friends is openly gay, married to his partner and they have kids. Considering there was no Gay Pride when we grew up I think that's pretty cool. Another one of the guys, sweet, slightly geeky and on the small side shocked me when I saw a post high school picture of him. Six pack abs! I know because I counted! All I could tell myself was "What was I thinking!"

The dirty side of this Facebook thing is that while sitting in the safety of your own home you get to be judge and jury. Who looks good for their age and how is it they have no sagging or wrinkles. Even better, who didn't age well. Whose looks improved with age and who looks nothing like their younger selves. I can just hear myself thinking "hmm she gained a little weight." On occasion being bitchy is fun but its not the main reason to join Facebook.

The best reason to join Facebook is time travel. When talking with our old friends we might find ourselves back in the 60's in our fishnet stockings and go go boots dancing on the furniture in my room as if we were on Shindig or Hullabaloo! Wait, how did we all get into my room? Dance in my room we did, Go join Facebook if you aren't there already. There's nothing like feeling 16 again and without all the angst.

Social media rocks!