Much like cleavage, it's a matter of individual taste as to how much you want to expose yourself. Now that you have swallowed the bait I'm going to pull a switch! I'm not talking about *those* privates!
At a recent lunch/brunch/maybe even breakfast with a couple of gal pals we got to talking about social media, specifically how people act on Facebook and twitter. Some people don't like to share details of their lives. Some share too much.
I have some unwritten rules. Actually I didn't realize I had them until we started to talk about it. I will share all the good stuff. I will even share all the stupid stuff that I do. Everyone can use a laugh even at my own expense. Seems in that department I have a rather large expense account! There is one condition, I only do it if I can do it in a funny at least semi witty way. It's not like everything or even anything I do is so interesting. Some of the fun is seeing that everyone else is as boring as we are!
The bad stuff I generally just don't share on Facebook or Twitter. Who needs to bring other people down? I think the only thing I shared in this category was when one of my dogs died. See! Makes you feel sad right? If I have a fight with my husband for example, no matter how tempting it is I don't share that. Although getting all the virtual hugs and "you go girl" kinda stuff is neat I can bug real life friends for that. The real reason I don't do it is because it's not all about me. He has a right to his privacy. Basically I can tell you that if you're looking for tales of woe keep moving. Nothing to see here.
Other people share everything. I mean Too Much Informationville! I guess it doesn't really bother my sensibilities. I'm not even sure if I have sensibilities. I rarely have plain old sense so we can safely assume the book Sense and Sensibility was not modeled after the likes of me. I read the TMI updates but I often don't know how to respond. If they really "let it all hang out" I usually stare for a little while and then move on. Hopefully I remember to close my mouth. Well how would you respond to someone who is fighting with their partner because he wants her to spank him! Do you REALLY want to get in the middle of THAT?! There's all sorts of other crazy stuff people put out there. I bet some of it is a way to get attention. Just don't overplay that hand. I can deal with all kinds of crazy, just not in large doses. Then you will be unfriended or unfollowed. You will be part of the walking Un!
There is another group of information overachievers. People who are going through a rough time in their lives. It could be anything from a sick family member, infertility or losing a job. Some people will use social media as a sounding board. Over and over and over again. They want you to respond but they don't really want to listen to anything you have to say. At some point you wonder if they are ever happy. Do they remember how to laugh at all? My reaction when the shit hits the fan is to laugh. I don't like the alternative. I try not to judge people who deal with things differently than I do. I feel for them because they obviously are in pain and need some kind of validation and or understanding. Sadly it seems they have an easier time talking to the virtual community than the real life people in their lives. Here too less would be more or I will start banging my head on my desk. I won't unanything them because I couldn't stand the guilt!
So how much cleavage do you like to show? Do you have any or is that a push up bra so you can get them some attention? It's all a matter of what feels right. Ultimately you need to be yourself. Being me will just get you into trouble!
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Mother of the Bride
Contrary to my title selection neither of my kids are getting married. Maybe it's a defect on my part but I don't feel it's a goal I need them to achieve. I just want them to be really rich so they can finally support me in the life style I would like to become accustom too!
This past week I went to a wedding and it got me thinking. What do I like and dislike about weddings. I mean aside from the whole chick movie romantic love thing which always gets me teary eyed. I have been to many different kinds of weddings, From black tie to a surprise wedding. The surprise wedding was my favorite and not just because I hate wearing heels! What the couple did was invite people to a party. I don't remember what the pretense was but once everyone got there the surprise was on us, the party goers! The bride wore a short white dress and she was beautiful. Oh and she didn't have to suffer through a bridal shower! Oh, did I say suffer?
Weddings are great for people watching. I'm not sure which I like better, the fashion disasters or the women right out of Vogue, Elle and Glamour. My advice to some from this past wedding is that if you are going to wear a very short mini and you have the legs for it than own it and wear a pair of fabulous high heels with the dress. As far as those who should not be wearing a mini but do, I'm not going to be catty. It's all kind of sad. This is the new older and gentler me. But for women my age? Well I'll say this. Some of you really need to learn how to dress! Maybe a mini is inappropriate but we don't have to dress like old dowagers either. There were some women I wanted to walk up to and say "Stop dressing up like your old aunt! Play time is over so grow up and dress like a fabulous adult woman!" Then there are those that dress well but don't own it. Walk like you know you look good. You've earned it!
I think weddings have gotten to be too big. That's my major complaint. It's supposed to be a celebration uniting two people who love each other. So why do the parents need to invite coworkers who don't even know the couple getting married? More presents? More prestige? Blech! I say invite just the couples friends and close family. This way the new couple is surrounded by love not people who are there for the open bar. Then people will actually listen to and enjoy all the toasts.
The where of the wedding really should be up to the couple and obviously what they can afford. I prefer non traditional places. I'm not a fan of the wedding hall and in fact I'd be happy with just some champagne and hors d'oeuvres on the beach. But thats just me and it's thirty years too late. I went like a lemming into the whole wedding hall thing and I didn't enjoy it at all. I want a do over!
In conclusion I love weddings for the romance. I love the fashion faux pas too but I dislike the crowds and the boring wedding halls they are usually in. If my kids get married I only wish for them that in their choices they never consider what other people will say and that they say fuck "the joneses", the Joneses better keep up with them!
This past week I went to a wedding and it got me thinking. What do I like and dislike about weddings. I mean aside from the whole chick movie romantic love thing which always gets me teary eyed. I have been to many different kinds of weddings, From black tie to a surprise wedding. The surprise wedding was my favorite and not just because I hate wearing heels! What the couple did was invite people to a party. I don't remember what the pretense was but once everyone got there the surprise was on us, the party goers! The bride wore a short white dress and she was beautiful. Oh and she didn't have to suffer through a bridal shower! Oh, did I say suffer?
Weddings are great for people watching. I'm not sure which I like better, the fashion disasters or the women right out of Vogue, Elle and Glamour. My advice to some from this past wedding is that if you are going to wear a very short mini and you have the legs for it than own it and wear a pair of fabulous high heels with the dress. As far as those who should not be wearing a mini but do, I'm not going to be catty. It's all kind of sad. This is the new older and gentler me. But for women my age? Well I'll say this. Some of you really need to learn how to dress! Maybe a mini is inappropriate but we don't have to dress like old dowagers either. There were some women I wanted to walk up to and say "Stop dressing up like your old aunt! Play time is over so grow up and dress like a fabulous adult woman!" Then there are those that dress well but don't own it. Walk like you know you look good. You've earned it!
I think weddings have gotten to be too big. That's my major complaint. It's supposed to be a celebration uniting two people who love each other. So why do the parents need to invite coworkers who don't even know the couple getting married? More presents? More prestige? Blech! I say invite just the couples friends and close family. This way the new couple is surrounded by love not people who are there for the open bar. Then people will actually listen to and enjoy all the toasts.
The where of the wedding really should be up to the couple and obviously what they can afford. I prefer non traditional places. I'm not a fan of the wedding hall and in fact I'd be happy with just some champagne and hors d'oeuvres on the beach. But thats just me and it's thirty years too late. I went like a lemming into the whole wedding hall thing and I didn't enjoy it at all. I want a do over!
In conclusion I love weddings for the romance. I love the fashion faux pas too but I dislike the crowds and the boring wedding halls they are usually in. If my kids get married I only wish for them that in their choices they never consider what other people will say and that they say fuck "the joneses", the Joneses better keep up with them!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
54 Things
You know what *they* say about being older and wiser. So I thought, what the hell, lets see if that's true. So I went and stole this idea from a snippy 33 year old whose blog I came across. I just had a birthday so here are 54 things I have learned in 54 years!
LIFE LESSONS
1.Being picked last for sports had absolutely no effect on my adult life. Good one huh? I thought I'd knock that one right out of the box!
2.Read a book or do whatever it is you love and don't worry about the dust in your house. Slacker wisdom but no less wise!
3.Even if you don't love your job have fun for the eight hours you are there. In other words "Don't let the bastards get you down!"
4.Check your pockets before doing the wash. Pockets of the clothes you are about to wash! Not the clothes you are wearing. Did I really need to say that?!
5.Only donkeys never change their minds.
6.Your hair will grow back. Okay that one is only true for bad haircuts not for men going bald. Sorry guys.
7. Do tricep push ups. You will thank me for that one ladies.
8.Take a sick day if you need one. I have over a years worth and no one really appreciates it. They're just glad they didn't have to deal with the inconvenience it would have caused THEM.
10.Take pictures of everything! If only we had had cellphones back in the day!
11. When you start to take yourself too seriously...STOP!
12.Motown is the perfect soundtrack for anything in life.
13. Drive like it's a privilege not a right.
14. Never say "It can't get any worse!" because it can and it will. God loves a challenge. Which leads us to #15.
15.God has a sense of humor.
16. Talk to your parents like they're real people. Try to discover what they're like when they aren't being your parent because once they're gone well they're gone.
16. No one should die alone. If it's too hard for you, tough shit.It's not about you so man up and that goes for women too!
17. Don't be facebook stupid! Whatever you put on facebook will be seen and not always by who you want.
18. Vote. It's the only thing keeping your form of government democratic.
19. I'm a good mother. Who knew?
20. Stories get better with age.
21.Be nice to the people underneath you. Learn their name. Say hi and say thank you. It will pay off and it's what you should be doing regardless.
FASHION
21.Dress like Audrey Hepburn and take Coco Chanel's advice about accessories.
22. Wear nice underwear. Besides the what if you get into a car accident thing, even if you're the only one who sees them, it gives you a feeling of power.
23.Don't wait until you really need an outfit to go shopping. That's exactly when you can't find a thing!
24. Buying a new pair of boots makes winter bearable.
25. If you love it then save it because it will come back in style. I wish I had saved my first pair of bell bottoms! And yes I know there is no way in hell they would fit me now!
26. Stop smoking. Wrinkles are never fashionable.
27.Buy clothes in your size not the size you want to be. Also when getting dressed check out how it looks from the back too. The general public will appreciate it.
28.When you go out looking like a slob because no one will see you is when you run into everyone! So do what I do, wear big sunglasses and cross the street!
FRIENDS
29.The people who cross your path do so for a reason. Pay attention.
30. Friends that don't make you feel good about who you are aren't friends. Cut em loose! You deserve better.
31. Nothing beats old friends and face it, you're going to need them to help remember all the old stories!
32.If a friend can't keep someone else's secrets then they won't keep yours either. When a friend tells me "Soandso told me not to say anything but" I just smile and put a little mental checkpoint next to their name.
33. Listen more. Do so by keeping your mouth shut and only use your ears.
34. Be a good friend. This way when the shit hits the fan of course you should remember to duck and but you will also have friends who will come and help you clean it up!
35. Playing outside is better than being on the computer.
BUT
36.You can meet really cool people via social media with whom you can then go out and play with!
37.Looks change. Not everyone ages well not even "the beautiful" people. But the most amazing thing is when you meet an ordinary or even not good looking person and you come to love them. They look beautiful to you. Oh and one more thing about looks. I saw a picture of this sweet nerd from like Grade school. Grown up he had the whole six pack abs and all I could say was "What was I thinking!" Looks, they can go either way.
38. My new friends are mostly younger than me. I think because all the women I meet that are my age seem old. Yet my old friends in both senses of the word do not seem old at all.
LOVE
39.If you want unconditional love buy a puppy.
40.Hold hands
41. Kiss goodnight. I mean really kiss. No quick pecks.
42.You can't always fix things so try not to break them to begin with.
43. The secret to a long marriage is not getting divorced.
RANDOM (read last minute)
44 Random acts of kindness are a rush. A girl at the bus didn't have enough money so I paid for her. She wanted to somehow pay me back. I told her to just do the same for someone else one day. Felt great.
45. Dancing makes you feel good. Have you ever watched an itty bittty kid at a checkout line just start to dance to the muzak? My point exactly!
46.Ocassionally do something you would not normally do. Feels exhilarating! Freaks people (who think they know you) out!
47.I can watch Casablanca over and over and still tear up at the end. I can read Lamb by Christopher Moore again and still laugh and be amazed at how good it is,
48.Starting to sweat as I learn just how hard writing a list is! The beauty of blogging is that it appears to have been done in one take!
49. Having an empty nest is a good thing. It means you did your job well and you can now rediscover who you are! This should have gone in the LIFE section but you don't tink I'm going to go and renumber everything?
50.There are 2 good things about menopause. No more periods and no worry sex!
51. When you fall down your knee always gets better after your Mom or Dad kisses it!
52. Leftover pizza is the breakfast of champions.
53. I may have gained some insight over the years but I have found that I still have the remarkable potential to screw things up!
AND FINALLY...DRUM ROLL PLEASE...#54
54. If you have an idea write it down because you won't remember it! I think I had some great wisdom to depart for this last one on my list but I didn't write it down and now for the life of me I can't remember it!
Thanks for sticking it out until the end! Hope some of it made you smile. Never doing this again. My brain hurts!
,
LIFE LESSONS
1.Being picked last for sports had absolutely no effect on my adult life. Good one huh? I thought I'd knock that one right out of the box!
2.Read a book or do whatever it is you love and don't worry about the dust in your house. Slacker wisdom but no less wise!
3.Even if you don't love your job have fun for the eight hours you are there. In other words "Don't let the bastards get you down!"
4.Check your pockets before doing the wash. Pockets of the clothes you are about to wash! Not the clothes you are wearing. Did I really need to say that?!
5.Only donkeys never change their minds.
6.Your hair will grow back. Okay that one is only true for bad haircuts not for men going bald. Sorry guys.
7. Do tricep push ups. You will thank me for that one ladies.
8.Take a sick day if you need one. I have over a years worth and no one really appreciates it. They're just glad they didn't have to deal with the inconvenience it would have caused THEM.
10.Take pictures of everything! If only we had had cellphones back in the day!
11. When you start to take yourself too seriously...STOP!
12.Motown is the perfect soundtrack for anything in life.
13. Drive like it's a privilege not a right.
14. Never say "It can't get any worse!" because it can and it will. God loves a challenge. Which leads us to #15.
15.God has a sense of humor.
16. Talk to your parents like they're real people. Try to discover what they're like when they aren't being your parent because once they're gone well they're gone.
16. No one should die alone. If it's too hard for you, tough shit.It's not about you so man up and that goes for women too!
17. Don't be facebook stupid! Whatever you put on facebook will be seen and not always by who you want.
18. Vote. It's the only thing keeping your form of government democratic.
19. I'm a good mother. Who knew?
20. Stories get better with age.
21.Be nice to the people underneath you. Learn their name. Say hi and say thank you. It will pay off and it's what you should be doing regardless.
FASHION
21.Dress like Audrey Hepburn and take Coco Chanel's advice about accessories.
22. Wear nice underwear. Besides the what if you get into a car accident thing, even if you're the only one who sees them, it gives you a feeling of power.
23.Don't wait until you really need an outfit to go shopping. That's exactly when you can't find a thing!
24. Buying a new pair of boots makes winter bearable.
25. If you love it then save it because it will come back in style. I wish I had saved my first pair of bell bottoms! And yes I know there is no way in hell they would fit me now!
26. Stop smoking. Wrinkles are never fashionable.
27.Buy clothes in your size not the size you want to be. Also when getting dressed check out how it looks from the back too. The general public will appreciate it.
28.When you go out looking like a slob because no one will see you is when you run into everyone! So do what I do, wear big sunglasses and cross the street!
FRIENDS
29.The people who cross your path do so for a reason. Pay attention.
30. Friends that don't make you feel good about who you are aren't friends. Cut em loose! You deserve better.
31. Nothing beats old friends and face it, you're going to need them to help remember all the old stories!
32.If a friend can't keep someone else's secrets then they won't keep yours either. When a friend tells me "Soandso told me not to say anything but" I just smile and put a little mental checkpoint next to their name.
33. Listen more. Do so by keeping your mouth shut and only use your ears.
34. Be a good friend. This way when the shit hits the fan of course you should remember to duck and but you will also have friends who will come and help you clean it up!
35. Playing outside is better than being on the computer.
BUT
36.You can meet really cool people via social media with whom you can then go out and play with!
37.Looks change. Not everyone ages well not even "the beautiful" people. But the most amazing thing is when you meet an ordinary or even not good looking person and you come to love them. They look beautiful to you. Oh and one more thing about looks. I saw a picture of this sweet nerd from like Grade school. Grown up he had the whole six pack abs and all I could say was "What was I thinking!" Looks, they can go either way.
38. My new friends are mostly younger than me. I think because all the women I meet that are my age seem old. Yet my old friends in both senses of the word do not seem old at all.
LOVE
39.If you want unconditional love buy a puppy.
40.Hold hands
41. Kiss goodnight. I mean really kiss. No quick pecks.
42.You can't always fix things so try not to break them to begin with.
43. The secret to a long marriage is not getting divorced.
RANDOM (read last minute)
44 Random acts of kindness are a rush. A girl at the bus didn't have enough money so I paid for her. She wanted to somehow pay me back. I told her to just do the same for someone else one day. Felt great.
45. Dancing makes you feel good. Have you ever watched an itty bittty kid at a checkout line just start to dance to the muzak? My point exactly!
46.Ocassionally do something you would not normally do. Feels exhilarating! Freaks people (who think they know you) out!
47.I can watch Casablanca over and over and still tear up at the end. I can read Lamb by Christopher Moore again and still laugh and be amazed at how good it is,
48.Starting to sweat as I learn just how hard writing a list is! The beauty of blogging is that it appears to have been done in one take!
49. Having an empty nest is a good thing. It means you did your job well and you can now rediscover who you are! This should have gone in the LIFE section but you don't tink I'm going to go and renumber everything?
50.There are 2 good things about menopause. No more periods and no worry sex!
51. When you fall down your knee always gets better after your Mom or Dad kisses it!
52. Leftover pizza is the breakfast of champions.
53. I may have gained some insight over the years but I have found that I still have the remarkable potential to screw things up!
AND FINALLY...DRUM ROLL PLEASE...#54
54. If you have an idea write it down because you won't remember it! I think I had some great wisdom to depart for this last one on my list but I didn't write it down and now for the life of me I can't remember it!
Thanks for sticking it out until the end! Hope some of it made you smile. Never doing this again. My brain hurts!
,
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Divine Intervention
Well I'd like to think so but it could just as easily have been my older daughter who at times has thought she's right up there with the Top Gun! Actually who the hell cares. Not you dear reader who as of yet is clueless. It seems the man of my dreams, aka my husband has read my blog lHe hasn't up until now because it is for women my age and he is a guy my age.
So the intervention part of this divine occurrence happened because he read my Owner's Manual posts. Being that my birthday is coming up he avoided an oops because he read what I wrote. Although he gets mad credit because even his wrong choice was something he thought about. It's nice when that face across from you actually sees you! Truth be told, I would have taken that gift, the one I am not getting and I would have loved it anyway.
So now the only question that remains is if it was my daughter who reads my blog that told her Dad or has the Person Upstairs started reading it too? And even if it was her, could that not be the work of the Divine too? You know with those mysterious ways and all. Hey, I'm getting a present and isn't that by itself just divine!
So the intervention part of this divine occurrence happened because he read my Owner's Manual posts. Being that my birthday is coming up he avoided an oops because he read what I wrote. Although he gets mad credit because even his wrong choice was something he thought about. It's nice when that face across from you actually sees you! Truth be told, I would have taken that gift, the one I am not getting and I would have loved it anyway.
So now the only question that remains is if it was my daughter who reads my blog that told her Dad or has the Person Upstairs started reading it too? And even if it was her, could that not be the work of the Divine too? You know with those mysterious ways and all. Hey, I'm getting a present and isn't that by itself just divine!
Friday, October 1, 2010
The Ripple Effect
When you've lived, well, as long as I have you can start to see how seemingly small events changed your life. I started to look at how these little ripples had their effect on my life.
In 4th grade we moved roughly about 15 blocks. Those 15 blocks put me in a new neighborhood. Two years later B moved to the neighborhood and we became best buds in junior high school. If neither of us had moved we wouldn't have become friends and then gone to camp together and joined the youth movement attached to the camp. If we hadn't gone to said camp we wouldn't have been sent by the movement to a year abroad studying after high school. Then I would never have met my husband C who was also on the program. We met when he asked me for a light at the airport in Paris because at the time I was smoking. So while I agree with the surgeon general I am glad I was a defiant youth who was smart enough to quit as an adult.
So had we both not gone on this program we never would have met and C would never have come with me to camp that summer which means he never would have met M and become his best friend. This is important because even though C and I parted ways shortly after that summer, six years later I came back to NYC for a visit and C was there too because M was getting married. Are you keeping up? After six years apart I was face to face with C. Without all that came before it never would have happened that the flame was rekindled that I lit in Paris all those years ago.
Crazy, but everything that happens in your life matters!
In 4th grade we moved roughly about 15 blocks. Those 15 blocks put me in a new neighborhood. Two years later B moved to the neighborhood and we became best buds in junior high school. If neither of us had moved we wouldn't have become friends and then gone to camp together and joined the youth movement attached to the camp. If we hadn't gone to said camp we wouldn't have been sent by the movement to a year abroad studying after high school. Then I would never have met my husband C who was also on the program. We met when he asked me for a light at the airport in Paris because at the time I was smoking. So while I agree with the surgeon general I am glad I was a defiant youth who was smart enough to quit as an adult.
So had we both not gone on this program we never would have met and C would never have come with me to camp that summer which means he never would have met M and become his best friend. This is important because even though C and I parted ways shortly after that summer, six years later I came back to NYC for a visit and C was there too because M was getting married. Are you keeping up? After six years apart I was face to face with C. Without all that came before it never would have happened that the flame was rekindled that I lit in Paris all those years ago.
Crazy, but everything that happens in your life matters!
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